We start, around the turn of the millenium, with a dot on the map: a small city where tickets to the local cinema cost only two dollars. Just outside city limits sat a parsonage, inwhich memorable history was being formed:

"That's so easy, even Zach can read it!" called one of the others.

Now, others there were, in contrast to the big people, who, here, seemed to run the joint by joint-ownership.

I was beckoned toward a newspaper, where a three-panel cartoon was being indicated.

"Here, read this!"

My first test of skill... would I succeed, proving my capability, or fail, showing the known universe that I was most inferior.

Panel 1: Garfield sits on the counter, saying "Zzzzzzzz" Panel 2: Garfield is still sitting on the counter, Jon is watching. Garfield says "Zzzzzzzz" Panel 3: Jon breaks the pattern of Zee's, and says ________...

I couldn't do it. I was the only person who didn't know how to read.